Oftentimes, these people just cant help but stick their noses in things they actually have no business with. But, compared to messaging, pigeons are much slower. Are you serious? How much do you charge to deliver an STD? It would be easy to answer that question with a simple "I'm fine, thank you.". My guardian angel be like 2. This one gets to the point of what they want to know, it's humorous, and it makes ya think. Yup, I dont share it. Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. The fact youve replied at all has come as a shock. Thank you Fred. 84. I dont chase them just to satisfy my sexual desires. I'm glad to know that you're alive.". I'd rather answer to a 'What's your favorite "I'd rather die" response alternative' thread on reddit. As Head Of Content Operations, Harini sets the tone and editorial direction for StyleCraze to deliver engaging, interesting, and authentic content revolving around women's health, wellness, and beauty. What Is A Micro Wedding And How To Plan It? Because they are already taking their time. The police? Someday, you might actually say something intelligent. Discover what these funny, yet morbid, jokes about burial and death have in common in this hilarious piece about "Alive Jokes". is willie rogers of the soul stirrers still alive; cal berkeley football recruiting questionnaire; american housewife cancelled. 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass! (This line came from the cartoon show. Funny Answers to How Are You Doing? Everyone wants me, but no one dares! Our goal is to create English lessons that are easy to understand for everyone. Socioeconomically? Just because you have a dick doesnt mean you need to act like one. 41. I used to think you were a pain in the neck. Acting like a prick doesnt make yours grow bigger. [Read: The step-by-step guide to being a funny person and make everyone love your company]. So, you changed your mind? I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. 7. You don't want to give the same, bland answer all the time. I dont feel that great, but look! Some of us are just destined to walk this world alone. My favorites were: "I'd rather have bamboo shoots shoved under my toenails." "I'd rather be in hell with both arms cut off." He was an angry, creative man. Required fields are marked *. Hmmph. 8. If someone clearly doesnt want to talk to you, the best thing to do is not talk to them. 56. 71. I'm wondering how you are. I was gonna try #6 "Any finer I'd be China." Your secrets are always safe with me. I suggest you do a little soul searching. Obviously, thats because I dont have a boyfriend/girlfriend! Me being single is just a conspiracy! Through humorous musings about Scalia's . Why would you talk to someone at their convenience when they wouldnt speak to you when you needed them.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_2',106,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_3',106,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');.medrectangle-3-multi-106{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:50px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. "Any day above ground is a good day. Because Im awkward and ugly. What to say when your crush asks how you are? 6. Awwits so cute when you talk about things you dont understand. This one is bound to get a laugh. Oct 13, 2021 - Explore Beverly Sadler Majkut's board "MAXINE CARTOONS", followed by 864 people on Pinterest. Just look what happened there! 40. Real may recognize real, but real also recognizes thoughtless people who don't deserve your time. 69. The following responses dont require wit, but do require a funny bone. Here are 28 of the best ghosting responses to send someone whos been ignoring you. I Don't Miss, I Kiss A sweet bit of poetry that sounds super romantic. Plotting how Im going to take over the world. This does not seem right. However, the time it takes for a puppy to grow up is a lot longer than it should take for someone to reply to your message. At minding my own business? If you are not happy being single, then you will never be happy being in a relationship. I repeat I am plural! Its always annoying when people take a long time to reply. Perhaps it will encourage them to respond quicker in the future. All jokes aside, death is one of the few "sure things" in life, and it's also something all of us have in common. This one is a bit long. Do you have a minute? is perfect for lunch-time banter with colleagues. They used to call them jumpolines, until your mom jumped on one. 16. Martin holds a Masters degree in Finance and International Business. If this doesnt cause them to reply, then maybe you should rethink your friendship with this person. #19: Bumble comeback The best comeback text yet. So the next time someone asks you why you're still. Everyone has a different sense of humor. You are about as interesting as a documentary on dirt. Thats the biggest joke Ive heard recently. Ill get back to you tomorrow when the results are in. Doing fairly well, unless you have some contagious disease and are about to infect me . But, because they have taken so long to reply, you have grown older and wiser. Because you havent put a ring on it yet. If you want, Ill give you a discount, baby. No one loves superheroes. Are you asking just to make yourself feel better? Like for your friends and close ones, here are some witty responses and replies to make them laugh, because they know exactly how you're doing and ask you as par of formality. Sort of. It was also revealed that 40% of users who said they had done the ghosting did so because they simply didnt know how to explain their disinterest and felt that disappearing altogether was less hurtful. This is one of those worst epic responses to I love you makes us feel for the poor love-struck fellow. Your email address will not be published. 2 I'm Still on the Right Side of the Grass As long as you're still breathing, you can use this reply. I dont know. The government? What an impertinent question to ask a girl! Tell me, how can I face my problems when the problem is my face? I wrote him a cheque for it, post-dated of course. Chic Murray (comedian), When I die, I hope to go to heaven, whatever the hell that is. Ayn Rand (author), The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesnt get worse every time congress meets. Will Rogers (actor), "My grandmother was a very tough woman. Youre not as bad as everyone says. 95. Now that is pretty f****** funny. Read about the differences between burning alive, staying alive and being dead or alive as we explore the many ways of keeping ourselves in the land of the living. Some of the best, wittiest, and most humorous quotations in the English language are quotations about age, childhood, adolescence, middle age, and old age most of all, about growing old! 86. More like, How I Met That Jerk I Quickly Forgot About. Check out the following infographic for some practical tips to maintain a conversation and take it forward.SaveIllustration: StyleCraze Design Team. The music billboard charts got it wrong! You speak as if youre not single yourself! Read more about Martin here. No, waitIm actually plural. Joshua Burns, "Death is a delightful hiding place for weary men." Im single by choice. I'm not Hal and we're not in space. Unlikely, but worth a shot. I mean, no matter how amazing our lives are, there's always something to complain about. Your question is registered, we will answer when in the mood. Best "How Are You?" Answers. Theyre not replying to you, but theyre posting on Twitter. Because Jamaican me crazy! Are you always this dumb, or are you making a special effort today? WHY!? 11. However, I dont recall anything about morons. Its more likely that theyre just being a bad friend. Every civilisation has its genesis and its conclusion. Lets just say if I was a Pokmon, my ability would be Oblivious., Listen, that feeling we call love is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed. 29. But, whats the likelihood of that happening? This means that when they get super excited, it can cause their heart to beat too fast, which causes death. 62. I laugh at my own jokes before I finish them. Stop asking me why Im single! The hottest single of the year is me. Do you ever find yourself getting annoyed with yourself because you just thought of an awesomely good comeback to something someone said earlier? 3 I'm Just Wondering How You Are "Fine" is a boring conversation-killer. 3. Spiritually? You can fire back with a witty and flirty response. How do you usually respond to the question? In reality, they are not cool, they are just rude. "See, I will finally make you smile.". No one will expect to hear it, so you'll be catching your friends off guard. My day was fine, it was everything else that was the problem. I always root for the little guy. Siri, why am I still single? If they insist that they are bad at replying, you should unfollow them, because you are bad at following people who are bad at replying. If youre going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty. How Am I Still Alive. Whats with all these questions? Without your thumbs, its unlikely you will be able to text anyone. Be Thankful To Be Alive Quotes. 3. parkerbilly 3 yr. ago. Stellar, great, fantastic but dead inside. Is my relationship status a joke to you?! Let me introduce you to a man who wrote a comeback so good, he instantly won a date. You sure have a bodacious rackfor a guy. 8. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Sure, we all have things to do, but when someone takes two days to reply, that is a sign that they are the problem. The only thing offending me right now is your face. "Still alive" is polite. But sometimes sending a little message before excommunication can give you the confidence boost you need to dropkick them from your mind for forever. Trying to understand the meaning of life or the universe at least. Thats because my crush is a fictional character. Thats because I get about as much attention as a white crayon. You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the. So, how does average sound? I cant really complain, but I will still try. His songs often parodied popular musical forms, though they usually had original melodies. If your crush asks you how you are, you might as well be honest. How are you? could be much more than a basic question, but we tend to stick to the same old, half-hearted responses. Then the worms eat you. Getting better with every passing second. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. But, as soon as we feel better, that person no longer serves their purpose. (Say it like he or. It's Okay. Great, but I should warn you that I am totally biased. There is no gray area (<brain matter joke): either you are brain-dead or you are not. Hopefully, youll stay there. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two." Now I have a much lower opinion of you. 2. She is a Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner from The Priority Academy and has over 17 years of experience in content writing and editing for online media. So perhaps the issue is not that they are taking a long time to reply. Alexa's response: I'm sorry, Dave. You could totally take the high road: Lose their number and forget about them altogether or, you could do that after sending them a final funny (but fierce) text to bid your time together adieu. 382 Likes, 344 Comments. He's jokingly texting if you're ok. Living a life of suppressed rage, emotional imbalance, and denial. So, it might be wise to double-check they're still alive before you complain. Scroll down! He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Brian OldWolf (author) from Troon on January 20, 2020: Shing Araya from Philippines on January 08, 2020: All are witty and funny at the same time. Looking for funny responses to everyday questions? Here, there are hilarious replies, witty comebacks, flirty responses, and many other answers to this question. I'm so sorry I expected you to acknowledge my existence after hanging out? Use them as you see fit when someone pokes their nose on your relationship status. Heart-shattering. How to respond to an ex asking how you are? 88. Hopefully he'll compliment you right back. 35 Amazing And Funny 70th Birthday Ideas T 35 Amazing And Funny 70th Birthday Ideas To Make It Memorable, 101 Cool And Different Ways To Say Hello And Greet People, 101 Cute And Adorable Responses To "I Love You", Funny Jokes To Tell Your Friends And Make Them Laugh, Interesting Speed Dating Questions To Ask Him Or Her, 101 Questions To Ask Your Crush To Know Them Better, 350 Truth Or Dare Questions To Have Fun At The Next Party. Tip #3 - Confidence is Key. Are you Jamaican? The friendly ghost would never leave you hanging. Most of the time, that is not true. Before I answer, I let you know that those who know my age get bad luck. Thank you, it made my day. Usually, people live and learn. Whoever cast a voodoo spell on my love life can chill now. This person is taking so long to reply, you will be waiting for geology to change before you get one. "I'll get back to you once I'm back from my long-awaited trip to the fridge.". 9 Best Ways To Ask Someone To Talk On The Phone, 9 Other Ways to Say Im Good At on a Resume, 10 Polite Ways to Say No Visitors after Surgery, 11 Best Ways to Say Im Here for You to a Loved One, 10 Professional Ways to Say I Am Not Feeling Well. It's one of the best replies to "How are you?". This one is a bit depressing, which is why you should watch when you use it. (Wriggle your hips) I am as happy as a tick on a big, fat doggy. When someone insults someone, the insulted might walk out of the room, or just stop talking to the other person. TikTok video from Mark Winston (@markwinstonbball): "Are you still alive? Checklists & Reminders! Hanging by a thread. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Here are 55 funny coronavirus memes that will make you LOL. Hence, you may need to put in some effort to keep the conversation flowing. 1. Break the cycle, rise above, focus on science! Why do you ask? Well, seeing as you care, how long do you have? I am high-quality, 100% plant-fed. [Read: 20 wise medieval insults you could bring back into trend]. Hey, I can see straight to the back of your head when I look into your eyes! It's impossible for things to be perfect. 2. Ah, sarcasm. "I am doing good, thank you" is basic, and you can do better than that! Still with us. conservation international ceo; little debbie peanut butter creme pies discontinued. It looks like your face caught fire and someone tried to put it out with a baseball bat. original sound - Tyren Sams. Someone took their costume way too seriously. 61. This just in: Bad communication skills are not trending this season!

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