That is neither respect, love or caring that they are showing to you when they do this, it is a selfish, self pitying behaviour no matter how anyone sugar coats it. A year ago my husband received an email from a female worker with a bikini picture attached. He said she bought a car from him and the car broke down. I think you are 100% correct in wanting to end the relationship because you can’t trust him. Yesterday I wrote him a letter. But I do think between him and me, it was an emotional connection. This was the best way for me to have found I had the facts. I have been with my man for 8 years and married for two. I feel he’s lying to me about any type of affair w her. He is a hard working man, he’s absolutely wonderful with my girl, he is a great provider, my family loves him, he has never hit me or tried to hurt me in any way. And no amount of talking and making excuses will cover up the fact that we chose to stay with a spouse that can’t be trusted. I dont know what to do , i’m a stay at home mom of 3 young children, I need to make the right decision for me and for them. And if i have been talking to any guy friends he blows up on me. 9 Ways to Know if Your Husband is Lying About Cheating. :). They just don’t know what a fraud he is. Usually pornography is a catalyst for other problems in a marriage that can be waiting to surface. fights fought? I’m really sorry to hear what you have gone through. Are you happy in this relationship? And just before he gets friends with girl number on, hes unfriends this second girl. He gave me her number, even though I was so angry I knew I would be able to get much information out of her if I wasn’t calm and didn’t play the part of being calm in this matter. If any of this sounds familiar, your answer may lie within. I have had enough. In fact, he did lie to me here recently about where he told me he ways going and where he actually went. I m married in 2009. v have a female child. His addiction and i dont know how to help him. May you find wisdom, hope, and guidance. He doesn’t care to ask for my work schedule to see if we can hang out nor does he make any efforts to hang out. The counselor suggested he write her a letter telling her she was a big mistake, that he woukd not protect her ever, and that she was never to contact him again. Pack his stuff up; change the locks, be ready with the police if needed and keep his pathetic a*** out hun xxx. And, don’t rely on the internet or online advice blogs! Is he away from home and you do not know where he is? That why he would have all them girls on his skype. A piece of advice i know it’s hard to deal this kind of situation but you need to be more patient. Make loving jesters like leaving love notes and sweet text messages! To feel respected and to once again feel powerful . I found condoms in his shaving kit which of course he tried to say they’ve been there for years. In such cases I think a Private Investigator can help you find out if your husband is cheating. He has always needed attention from women, he’s very friendly & flirty with women. I asked him if he wanted an open relationsihp and he said NO! Why do you think you deserve to be with men who cheat on you? Reading the texts between them two shattered my whole world. About a month ago I found out about my husbands affair, a couple weeks prior he started to tell me he didn’t have feelings for me anymore and that he no longer was in love with..but loved me because I am the mother of his children. Every thing that says to be done I can’t do. He plays poker as well and goes to the casino 2 times a week or every other week. Good luck follow ur gut not all those other fluttery feelings u matter and u deserve to be truly loved!! For better or for worse does exist. Found that out cause of the phone bill. I was and still am constantly wondering why he would do such a thing. Is your husband lying about cheating? These words hurt me very much because I thought I was his perfect partner. (The lube was apparently so he could get some “alone time”)?? i confronted him and he said their just friend and they got nothing to do with me they knows he is mined. i have asked him in the past who women were calling his phone and he gets very defensive telling me i don’t need to “snoop” through his phone, yet he gave it to me to use while mine is turned off…he doesn’t want me in any way any more and it hurts…3 children later and i’m not good enough anymore?…what do i do? If your wife is suspicious of you, it’s because you are behaving suspiciously. All the Best. Ive never seen tears come from a man, but today he was crying, telling me how much he loved me and how he didnt want to loose me, and how sorry he is.! Example: ”I’ll bring many smiles to your life. http://theadventurouswriter.com/quipstipsrelationships/is-your-spouse-cheating-stds/. Let the other person deal with that drama. I wasnt brought up this way and if my father was still alive he would be SOOOOO disappointed in me. 2) Around that time, I found that he was looking for women on facebook. Everything the exwife told me about her husband and this woman is happenning to me now .Is there anyway I can get this man to leave me and move in with this woman, My husband paid lobola for me, but we have not finilised the traditional ceremony, but he is seeing his snons mother behind my back, Hi I’m going through enough with my life as well I’ve been talking to this guy for almost 2 years now he always told me he loved me an did almost anything for me then i found out he was married an now have a baby on the way i been involved with him for to long now i dont no what to do i no i need to call the quits but how someone help please. Do yourself a favor and move on – start dating someone else AND NEVER BOTHER WITH HIM AGAIN. I feel like I have gone insane. But why can’t I shake this feeling? Long story short: he told me he he wasn't in love with me but wanted to work on our marriage. There are many hurtful circumstances which must have lead to the mistrust. I could not handle the rejection from my husband . I’ll keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I dont like divorce so i like to think people can try to work through it the first and only time it happens but more than once is a slap in the face and him saying he doesnt care, which he probabley doesnt. It doesn’t make sense. I will admit, I actually can be a little paranoid and jealous since that first time, so I don’t want to jump the gun. Just try to see the funny side. I hope it helps, and again offer my apologies for not being able to give you personal help. This is the point where we start a steady decline. It’s not that YOU’RE boring, it’s that he may not know how to sustain a long-term relationship. My husband and I have 3 kids, the youngest is 2 years old now. */. but im learning to be happy with myself, my 2 boys and have good friends :) if yall hear me! Do you realy want to do this, those are the question you should ask yourself also? Now i really find my self just setting alone. But, it doesn’t seem to be enough. nor any guy because of my past that every boyfriend that i hve ever been with has cheated on me. You’ve caught him cheating three times. The problem is to really say. Stand your ground and do not believe you do not deserve better. I just want him to be honest with me. BUT I AM LEARNING what a good guy looks like and learning how to let them get closer & let THEM LOVE ME FOR ME!!! I came home around 1:30am and he is usually wide awake playing on his xbox or something, so I was a little surprised he was sleeping flat on his back on our bed, barley covering himself with a blanket. Your point is very well taken. He is so much addict of it that I am pretending that all is fine around me . ? I thought my relationship for great until I found out that he was sleeping with someone that he works with. Found out a few days ago he has had my Facebook info to spy on me. If you want to know if your husband is lying about cheating. But I am also terrified of investing more time and energy into someone who has let me down this early on in our relationship and risking getting hurt even more later. Why would someone tell me this. On his skype I see a girl, who he met at the same time with me. He will endlessly deny it, and you’ll have no way to know whether he’s lying. I then asked if he knew where they may have gone? I didnt see the big deal. He acted on his impulses. I must tell you, if want any chance at a happy life… DUMP THAT MAN! You just have to know that in your heart you are a good wife and if I were you I would tell him how to really feel. I found romantic emails and lewd pictures only recently and since then I’m trying to grapple with the reality of a cheating husband, whether or not I want to stay in the relationship and if so, how to work towards a better marriage, and if I decide to leave, get myself enough support and become financially stable for myself and my new born. I confronted him and he called me a bi**h and later appolgized for it. Something still feels off, though, and there’s a reason for that—deep down, you know that he’s cheating. It sounds that way on a lot of these comments actually. He felt obligated to his family because THEY gave the wedding. I’m somewhat independent and move with focus and intent. Yes, you will struggle financially — and your heart will be broken because you have to let go of someone you love. I used to cry and beg him not to leave me when he would say, “I’m tired of this s***! It’s all I’ve got left. Having an affair is just not adultery, it includes lying, deception and breaks a vow and trust between the couple. Paper conversation turned into i miss you and love you/ wanting you back… i guess he wanted to feel wanted and needed by this women. I was physically sick. i reAlly think he had the bypolor or whatever it could be but he smart. We combined two households and his stuff is everywhere and we are not going to buy a home anytime soon. Anyway, I keep a diary of his narcisstic behavior, lies, everything. I still do not know to this day what was worse – founding out about him having an affair or what went on after he was found out. We are God’s blessings to those in our lives that we love. We did fall on hard times. I feel like such a failure I miss being me and being happy : ( it should be a crime to cheat to rob your spouse and children of love and joy that you promised when you spoke vows. Yet, had the nerve to tell me he was going to the firehouse to get homework done, because our daughter was being a pain in the butt throwing a temper tantrum and he needed to concentrate. My husband and I have been married two years now. He’s only told me he loves me twice in the entire year and it was more at the 3 month mark, not so much anytime in the past few months. And why you would never mention me them. I get it. this is cheating, isn't it? But you Teresa have not described any circumstances or evidence that leads me to think your husband is cheating. We had small children at the time and I mananged to keep the family together and he changed his ways.Fast forward to 2008. He looked me in the eye and told me I shouldn’t believe anything she had told me and that she was crazy and loved to mess his relationships up. That marriage by the way ended because my wife was sleeping with another man. He came home but I had found out he had begun using while away. And he grinned and said she had knee surgery and he had called to see how she was doing. He has been a real as….le , he brought her to our home, to our bed, and he even brought my baby to her several times and he was making love while my baby was sleeping in the car or so he says so. Hello. We have been through so much together. I caught him looking at porn several times and then caught him viewing it 5 feet away from me. I do recognize that he has been the one who has had to take over all chores like cooking (which he did before), cleaning, laundry, etc. We get back home. We first met through a mutual friend. At this point my Husband did not mind. Of course there are other hardships that come along with ending a relationship, but to stay where you aren’t respected or loved just seems outrageous to me. I didn’t even recognize that I was severely depressed all those years! (sitting beside eachther at bar, excursions, lunch, walking along beach) yet he says he doesnt know her that she was a stranger. He was there for 2 weeks and in that time I had recieved a facebook message from a girl I’d never met before. I have struggled with my husband for over 15 years. He would always get angry or flustered when I would ask about the women he has been messaging or Skypeing with. What prompted you to search the internet for articles about husbands cheating? My neighbor husband is cheating on his wife throughout their marriage. I picked it up to Google some advice on vitamins when I saw “Where to find a prostitute ?’ in the search field. He doesn’t text anymore or call. We had to get married and had our son 6 mos. It sounds like you’re confused and conflicted about your relationship. Is there any man out there that can be single? You’ll have no one but yourself to blame if you wake up in 20 years after wasting your life trying to hold on to a man who has made it clear that he thinks you’re not even worth trying to lie to. He would only call her at night while he was at work or during the day when I wasn’t home. I hate to tell you but he’s cheating. And when I confront him, he said it’s not true and he never sent any of those messages. He was the perfect husband and dad, caring, helped around the house, gave me surprises every know and then, that is why I never suspected it, and now I am totally confused and do not know if i should give him an opportunity thinking he will never do it again. He didn’t answer my calls. Don’t ever underestimate your partner. You stayed despite knowing he spent the night with another woman irrelevant of whether he had sex. Hey anonymous, pretty sure that’s my husband your venting about. Well I think my husband is cheating also he texts other girls I snooped in his phone he told one girl he. Despite the fact that I have been cheated on in a relationship, I myself have actually never cheat on the person I was involved with. So this time i did snoop. Than when he comes home he leaves, he’ll go to his mothers or go where ever he can go to get away from me. And when I got pregnant last year, the email communication increased and my husband actually went off to him home town to meet this woman. But he never puts me on mute when he buys stuff or orders food while on the phone with me so why put me on mute to ask a store guy to buy a blunt? I’m thinking about just giving up and not ever bringing it up again. He works as a sales agent with an auto insurance and gets home anywhere between 6:30-8:30 at night but.starts his shift at 9am every morning. We have a 3 mth old together. He begged for me to stay You and I are worth more than that! She brought him baked goods, if one was working and one was not they called each other even while on vacation. The other day I did something wrong and snooped through his computer. If your husband is best friends with a woman and leaving you out of the relationship, it may be an emotional affair. I told him that I just need some alone time and that I'd talk to him tomorrow. Your subconscious is picking up on hints and clues, and that’s why you’re suspicious of him. The pictures on her profile were all bikini pictures. I feel I am going crazy…Any advise. So he stood and never really apolygized. I have a 3 year old daughter from this relationship. His excuses was he was not happy. Our bodies produce nourishment for our child. But I have to be honest, why do you even want to continue this relationship? If he would just say that he was deeply sorry for being such a stupid idiot to not consider my feelings about the way he carried on always putting her first, it may ease my intense anger and distrust of him… but he wont. Lately though up until now he doesn’t try to even hardly make a move to sleep with me…he never makes out with me unless we are doing it. So when you say to check his phone and email I already do so he would know how to hide it really good specially sense he knows a lot about computers. I kicked him out tonight. But I believe that in reality monogamy is unnatural for humans. My husband went to a concert out of town last night. And he even try to contact his ex. And then you are surprised why I loose myself over a picture. When it comes in, I do believe i’ll be moving out then. one day while he was drunk i copied his password so that day i open his phone and i could not believe of what i saw. I hate these women working with our husbands and our husbands letting some other woman at work be the “friend”. I have chewed my nails to bits over this issue, because I haven’t the tiniest clue how to approach this situation. I talked to several of the girls he had been with and he told them the same thing your guy did. You are an escape but you are not reality! I have no idea who he is. and he doesnt know why he does it. I know my gut instinct is right. He’ll keep cheating and lying until he decides to leave you. He became a monster and put even my own lawyer on his side inventing stories that Im a difficult person and dirty when he never even flush the toilet. Give a counselor a call — you may need only an hour to talk things through and get some clarity. I tell him I love him. Now he shows no remorse, he even confessed he loves her and that if the husband of hers didnt threaten hi, they would both continue together because they love each other. I wanted out then, but he convinced me to stay. The road to mistrust started there and a year later I still don’t trust them. Just think about how happy we’ll be in our happy little house.” She’d found a rental in the neighborhood for him to move out into, 3 bedrooms so the boys could go back and forth. I don’t know what to do. A sign your husband is lying about cheating is the frequently used words on his phone. Very Narsassistic!!! I have no place to go, my family lives in Atlanta and I have no money saved. Or get a divorce. It’s hidden so he won’t see. Enough said…when your surrounding slowly starts giving you a bad eye or bad looks then it means the person you are with is giving you a bad name. I don’t know what else to do!!!! He has a history of lying to me but thought he had stopped. I don’t even like saying that because I think it’s sneaky and deceptive, but women have found out about affairs that way. I decided once and for all that day i will never ever turn my back to that person in my life agan enough is enough. The uncertainty about whether he has ever cheated on me is what makes me think I should leave. He tells here is sorry and to please not tell me. We went to marriage counseling for 2 months, he started to believe in God, would pray together….but has since stopped. Back off…he didn’t know how to tell you that he didn’t want you working with him without hurting you and causing you to massively over react. He made his choices. My wife told me (a few times actually) “I don’t mind if you cheat on me, just make sure I never find out”, I think the really point here is “don’t make me FEEL like you are”. Trust me, what this dumbasses doing is just one little page in the entire book of your life. I just want the truth and validation, then I will move on. Husbands generally do not want to cheat, the vast majority of husbands seeking sex outside of their marriage are driven to it. 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